This morning seems like a long time ago. I had a good day. It was a bit weird. Very back heavy with people without a break. A bit emotional without me knowing what to do with the emotion. I feel like I just have to get away from everything for a little while. Just be gone. Have a break from serving and giving and just have some time to let Laura spill out all over the place. That mainly probably just means that I feel like I could vent for several hours.
I did really well earlier today – probably because my time with God was very morning heavy. I feel like I am becoming more excited about my life. Today was technically my day for counseling, but my counselor is out of town. I feel okay. In fact it is nice to have a week without that three hours taken out of my life. It makes me wish I had the freedom to go less frequently, but I cannot afford to take a break right now. I need this in my life until I have worked through a great many more things.
I realize I have been interrupting people a lot lately. It really annoys me. I think I may need to find a place where I can talk more. I listen a lot. Sometimes I just feel like I have to say something and then I get less control over my tongue because I have been listening so long. When I am in a safe, relaxed environment, I feel like I spill out all over the place.
I am beginning to feel more and more like this is my home. This is where I belong. This is where God has planted me. I have no answers for some of the things He has put in my heart, but I do believe I am where I am supposed to be. I do not have to fulfill His promises. That is His job. All I have to do is follow Him today.
My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one. – John 10:27-30
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