This year I am having the best holiday season I have ever experienced. Best being defined as the one in which I am most content. It is a contentment that feels hard won. I have sought it for years. It was not easy to discover; and when I found it, I did not find it where I expected. It was not found where culture says it can be found.» Read more
My weekly thought
This afternoon, at this moment, at 3:13 pm, I have decided to take a sabbatical from writing publicly. I have loved recording my story here. It has been a journey in vulnerability. I am not ashamed of the work that my Savior has done in my heart during these four years of recovery. I simply need a break as I move forward making tremendous changes in my life. He knows the plans He has for me. I don’t, but I am sure they are going to be pretty amazing.
And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:18
I love Jesus. I love that every day with Him is better than the last. Some of these things sound so very cliché but are also very true. As long as I decide to follow Him through each season of my life, His glory will always be revealed more and more with each season. I have a promise that the fruit of the Holy Spirit will become more and more evident in me throughout my life. If I follow Jesus, I will always have the opportunity to have a better relationship with Him tomorrow than I had today. » Read more
When I was a child, I talked like a child. I walked like a child. I spoke like a child. When I became a woman, I matured and began to speak like a woman. I walked like a woman. I ate like a woman. Though to be fully truthful, I still want to eat candy like a child.
When I became a leader, I looked to the world around me to tell me what a leader was. In every environment where I have felt loved, comfortable and accepted, I quickly have risen as a leader or at least I rose to what the world defines as a leader. When I became a disciple, I put away worldly things and looked to my Savior to give me a new definition of leadership. » Read more
One of the things I really like about this blog is that I decided to go against the grain and not capitalize all the words in titles on anything except the monthly articles. I have no idea why I capitalize them. In my mind they are more officially writing, I guess. Truth be told, I have no idea why I have even kept this blog. It has been fruitful in odd and unexpected ways, but it is certainly not something I ever planned on doing. Now it is just a rhythm in my life. Something I do until Jesus tells me to stop. » Read more
For what seems like a really long time now, I have been finding solace in the Word of God. Since the day I gave my life to the Lord Jesus Christ, it has been a source of constant comfort and hope to me. No matter where I have been on my journey, I have found comfort in it in some way. Sometimes the rhythm would be formal Bible studies with hours of homework each week. Many times it would be falling asleep and waking up to Scripture reading. In some way, it was always a place I went for my salvation – even when at times I would convince myself that God was now okay with certain sins and had updated Himself to the 21st century. Scripture was a constant in my life. » Read more
“When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.” Genesis 3 » Read more
I have been having a super enjoyable life these last few months. It has its plot complications, but it has been filled with an irrepressible and uncontainable hope and joy. I am into these things. I have been learning to fight a victorious battle. Luke, Mark and now Acts have been doing wonders for my worldview. Spending a significant amount of time indulging and immersing in absolute truth brings joy, rest and hope like nothing else. Prayer has become a much bigger part of my life. Unceasing prayer seems somewhat unattainable but not entirely so. The peace of a life lived in submission to the King has been life transforming. » Read more
Sometimes time is a real constraint in my life. If you are a regular reader of this blog, you know that about three years and three months ago, I looked in the mirror one night. Talking to myself in bleary mindlessness, I said, “You know if you wanted to actually accomplish something with your life, you would have to spend _______ time with God a day.” » Read more
“I can’t help what I want.” “I can’t help what makes me feel good.” “I can’t help how I am wired.” “I can’t help how I find rest best.” “I can’t help what I find entertaining.” “I can’t help what my taste buds like.” “I can’t help what I crave.” “I can’t help what I find fulfilling.” » Read more